Monday, October 11, 2010

I suck

Avery started throwing up at about 4:00 this afternoon.  He was being crazy dramatic with it and wouldn’t get up and go into the bathroom.  I yelled at him.  If you know you are going to throw up get up and go into the bathroom, don’t puke on the couch and floor! 

What kind of person am I?  I felt like he was not hurting, he was walking good, he is throwing up, just go into the bathroom.  I know I tend to be dramatic too when I puke.  Ok he gets it honestly, but I do go to the bathroom.  So now I feel like crap. 

We don’t know why he’s throwing up and the Dr is concerned by the amount of steroids he’s taking that it can mask things.  Now we’re waiting to see if he keeps it up and can’t keep anything down.  I just wanted it to be a stomach bug, and I wasn’t yelling at him at much as I was yelling because it just won’t end.  I want him to get well, I don’t want him to have to go through all this.  And as Mike reminded me tonight he got this lovely disease as his 17th birthday gift. 

God heal my son.


  1. You do not suck!! You are human and broken right now, forgive yourself, tell him you love him and move on.

  2. Amy,
    Don't focus on those "bad" moments - you've been pushed to the brink and it's understandable, even though I know you feel terrible for being short with him. Just hug him and love him. This is such a bad onset, I'm so sorry Avery's going through all of this. You are in my thoughts and prayers tonight. I join in your prayer, God please heal Avery.